Do This To Heal From a Lifetime Of Procrastination

If you flip into my old journals from pretty much any point in my life… you’re going to see the same exact journal entries repeated over and over. 

They say,

“I’m tired of thinking about the things I want to do more than I actually do them.”
“Why is it so easy to imagine the life I want… but impossible to live it?”
“I’m scared I’ll be stuck like this forever.”

The worst part about feeling that way?

It didn’t matter how much I cared about something.
I could feel it in my chest, wanting to start… and still not move.
I’d tell myself, “Just begin. Just pick one thing.”
But instead, I’d scroll. Or pace. Or make another to-do list I wouldn’t follow.
And then feel sick with guilt afterward.

If that sounds like you, you’re not alone.

Today, I want to walk you through how I finally broke that cycle—not through sheer force, not with some magical productivity hack, but by learning what was actually happening underneath my stuckness.

Let’s break it down.

SECTION 1: Procrastination Was Never the Real Problem

For most of my life, I thought procrastination was about discipline.
I believed that if I just worked harder, tried more methods, bought the right planner—I’d get my act together.

But here’s the truth that changed everything:

Procrastination wasn’t my problem. 

It was a symptom.

A symptom of:

• Shame that told me every task was a test.

• Perfectionism that made “starting small” feel pointless.

• Emotional overwhelm that made my brain and body shut down the second I felt pressure.

If any of that rings true for you, then hear this:
You don’t need to fix your productivity system.
You need to fix the relationship you have with your effort.

And that starts by getting curious about your resistance instead of judging it.

SECTION 2: How I Used to Try (and Why It Failed Every Time)

Here’s what my cycles used to look like:

1. The Planning High
   I’d write the perfect list, map out the whole month, color-code every detail. It felt productive—but it wasn’t momentum. It was control.

2. The Avoidance Spiral
   The second a task felt emotionally loaded—important, uncertain, or vulnerable—I’d stall. Suddenly the laundry seemed urgent.

3. The Guilt Crash
   After hours (or days) of not doing “enough,” the shame would kick in. “You always do this. You’re falling behind.” I’d try to power through from a place of panic.

4. The Overcompensation Phase
   Eventually I’d force a burst of energy—hyper-focus for hours or days—but it was unsustainable. I’d crash again.

That cycle felt personal. But it wasn’t. It was patterned, predictable, and fixable.

This is the exact cycle I break down in my free guide: "The Pendulum of Self-Sabotage.” It walks you through the emotional root causes of your stuckness—and gives you gentle, doable next steps that don’t require willpower or pressure. If that sounds like something you need, you can grab it here. Totally free. Just a helpful starting point if you’re ready to shift this for real.

SECTION 3: What Actually Helped Me Start Following Through

So… what changed?

Three foundational shifts:

1. I Started With the Smallest Possible Action (And Celebrated It)

Forget “starting strong.” I started soft.

Some days, “working on a project” meant opening the doc and writing one sentence.
And then shutting the laptop.

That doesn’t sound impressive. But it built trust.
Because consistency isn’t about how much you do—it’s about showing up without fear.

2. I Removed Identity From the Task

Before, every task felt like a referendum on whether I was good enough.

So I started asking:
“What would this task mean if it weren’t about proving anything?”

That mental shift made it feel safer to begin—because my worth wasn’t on the line anymore.

3. I Replaced Judgment With Gentle Observation

Every time I got stuck, I’d say: “Okay... I’m pausing here. I wonder what’s underneath that.”

It sounds simple, but that one line created space between the stuckness and the story I was telling about it.

Instead of “I suck,” it became: “Something needs tending to here.”

That tiny shift turned my self-talk into a source of insight—not punishment.

SECTION 4: The Unexpected Wins That Followed

These changes didn’t just help me “get more done.”

They helped me:

• Stop resenting myself for being inconsistent.

• Follow through without emotional backlash.

• Feel genuinely proud of small progress.

• Stop waiting for a perfect day or perfect energy to begin.

I started creating things. Finishing things.
Trusting that showing up gently, even inconsistently, was still showing up.

I didn’t become a machine. I became a person I respected.

If you’ve been stuck in the same loop for years—telling yourself, “I should be able to do this by now”—please hear this:

It’s not about effort. It’s not about intelligence. It’s about unlearning the emotional patterns that keep you frozen.

Inside my program, I help ambitious people who want to make a difference just like you rebuild momentum without burnout. If you’re ready to explore whether that support could help you too, I’d love to meet you.

You can apply for a completely free discovery call using this link. No pressure. Just a real conversation about what’s keeping you stuck—and how we might change that.

Whenever you're ready, I’m here.